Please Don't Judge Me Because I Knowingly Did Something Very Unhealthy Today!


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Please Don’t Judge Me Because I Knowingly Did Something Very Unhealthy Today!



Feel Good Project day 60

Sitting here in a full California downpour (with lightning and thunder included!) which is not typical weather, and I am beyond loving it!!!

Yay! We get the winter Christmas weather I always dream about. Now if we could still work on that snow thing…

Today was one of those days where health felt pretty close to normal (meaning the new good normal I had been feeling from March all the way until October this year without many glitches) and when days like that happen I am just learning to say a big fat thank you to the man upstairs and enjoy the day, without the nagging, underlying feeling rotten that has surfaced as of late.

Besides my digestion on track today, I had a wonderful day catching up with my best friend for lunch (and did her hair one last time before she has a baby and I retire:) and then met my sister for a bit to actually go get our nails done.

One of my beautiful clients gave me a whopping $50 gift card to the best nail salon in town and I hadn’t been in years.


And that was not by mistake.

I have stayed the heck away from those toxic places like the plague since hearing and reading more about what all goes on at those places. Watching the documentary Lethal Beauty the other week on Gaiam was continued evidence in the dangers.

That’s why I feel so stupid even admitting I stepped foot in one after years and boycotting for my health’s sake.

I’ll be honest-it came down to passing up a chance to treat my sister (who had no problem with such a place-never had crossed her mind!) to a nice and free time together feeling a bit glammed up going into the new year. It sounds silly but have been battling the guilt about planning on meeting her there for days leading up to this.

I just hate knowing something is so bad for you and then choosing to do it anyway. I rarely do it and I am human and do stupid and not so fabulous things, and this was one of them that I chose.

We were only getting polished as we both are not big fans of the seemingly sketchy mani-pedi thing (even though this place is pretty nice still freaks us out!) so I assumed a ten minute appointment wouldn’t kill me and I could take zeolite and sweat it out in the sauna afterward.

The way that place smelled I feel as if a whole bottle of zeolite couldn’t undo the damage I just did to myself in the fifteen minutes.

I am not being dramatic-I am serious.

It brought me right back to my days in beauty school where the smell of acrylic nails literally made me sick day in and day out. The air seemed thick with fumes and acetone. Perfect chemical soup.

DANG. I KNEW better. This was a bad call in justification.

It got so bad that as soon as my nails were done being painted, I was OUT of there so fast and waited outside while they dried and for my sister to finish her appointment.

I am not feeling guilty or beating myself up anymore over it BUT I will say that this was one of those reminders to actually LISTEN to that soft tug in my heart when I know something is not ideal for me.

I can do better.

Sometimes I make these bad for me decisions based on the fact that I feel like the weird hippie often who brings her own hormone free turkey to Christmas dinner and won’t buy new sheets these days unless they are organic. The nail thing was just one more of those examples where I just got tired of saying no and explaining why.

Staying true to me is what I continue to learn. I feel my best when I go with my gut (even though I have to say-MY do my nails ever look amazing!) and this is all part of accepting myself, what I’d call ‘mistakes’ and all.

I know this looks different to everyone, and I think mine happens to be chemical sensitivity due to years and years of exposure.

I plan on enjoying my nails to the fullest extent but do not plan a repeat.

Feeling good means taking back the reigns in many areas of my life, and today was just another gentle reminder that it’s okay to not fit in all the time. Or ever:)

FEEL GOOD MOMENT OF THE DAY: Driving up to the health food store this morning the thick black and grey clouds parted for a moment while I was on the freeway. All of a sudden there looked like a large handful of shiny little white or silver circles that filled the sky in front of me a bit. I thought they were a bunch of mini UFO’s cruising around in all different directions. then I though giant bubble sup in the sky. They were shiny, glowing and magnificent. Turns out they were VERY white birds flying around with the dark background that just LIT them up. It was so peaceful, like watching a white feather float around a for a bit. Beautiful. It’s the small things! 🙂


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