I'm Already Feeling Vulnerable Before I Even Start

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I’m Already Feeling Vulnerable Before I Even Start

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Feel Good Project day 105

As much as I am all about listening to your own body, boy is it ever CHALLENGING to do sometimes.

I feel there are times where listening and actually DOING what it tells you to do are very very easy-a no brainer really.

Like that time you got that creeped out feeling about someone and your gut ordered you to turn the other way and run.

Or when you just knew that a certain food was causing you problems so you had no problem turning it down. When your body whispered that it was overheating and it’s time to get out of the sun for awhile…ALL situations I have had much practice at and I every time I listened and obeyed, my skill level and deciphering mechanisms got that much stronger, just like working out your muscles at the gym.

There is a learned and exercised element that goes along with listening and the results you will get.

HOWEVER great I think I have become at honing in on some of these practiced skills, the truth is that every single day I am faced with many more (sometimes brand new, new before experienced) situations in which I might fail miserably.

That is OK by me, as long as I TRY.

One of these challenging times is upon me again, as my digestion has taken a turn for the worst again, probably due to the adding in of many foods I know are not ideal for me right now, but was hoping to be healed enough by now to get away with.

I get frustrated by drastic pain in my body all but forcing me to take drastic measures to get back to where it desires to be.

All that being said, I am (yet again) embarking on a liquids fast starting tomorrow, in attempts to really let my gut take a much needed break.

This is NOT an easy thing for me. I have been prepping myself this entire week leading up to this fast by cutting out most cooked foods as well as all meats and heavy foods. Raw vegetables, juices, smoothies and broths have been leading up to this fast for the past three days, so I hope to help my body ease into this much better than fasts before.

My intention is to give my body a REALLY good go this time around and not cut short the healing/cleansing process. In the past I have succeeded at a ten day fast, but really hear my body asking me to do MORE this time.

I have been sitting in silent prayer and meditation in hopes of getting an answer to just HOW long I should fast for, and have so far come up empty. That’s okay. I will not give up and forge through my quiet time continuing to listen and I know I will get my answer.

This fast is really hard for me this time around. I feel very emotionally vulnerable this time, more than others. You think it would be the opposite, as I am now in a place where I don’t have to focus on my old job and keeping clients happy etc. For some reason though, I feel because I am full time working from the house now, that there will be MORE time to let my mind wander to how challenging fasting can be.

I pray I am wrong about this and will do all I can to mitigate these assumptions.

Mind over matter right?

Here I go again….I am listening now….

FEEL GOOD MOMENT OF THE DAY: Catching up on emailing friends both new and old, with actually quality time spent crafting the words I have been wanting to write for some time now. It’s so very easy to feel scattered these days with writing quick snippets and short letters to friends, that this was a refreshing time to get caught up without feeling like I should be doing anything other than just that.

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